Ballerinas, Lamborghinis, and The Band Camino

What would 7 or 17-year-old you think of who you are today?

At school this past week, I had my students write in their journals about what age they were most excited to turn. I wanted to see what expectations they had for the future and for who they wanted to be.

I had a student tell me she wanted to be thirty, so she could be a mom. Another said forty-nine, so he could be a chef. Naturally, 49 is the age when we all become chefs.

I had some say sixteen so they can drive or eighteen so they can do whatever they want. Some of my kids said they wanted to be old enough to get a job to help their parents pay for things. They dreamt of having a Lamborghini, being a vet, or playing a professional sport.

I felt inspired by the dreams and expectations they had for their futures and amazed by their confidence in sharing them with others.

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There’s a song by The Band Camino that I was listening to this weekend. One of the lyrics says, “How did you get so far away from everything you thought you’d be at 17?”

When I heard that line, it drew my mind back to what my students wrote about.

How do we get so far away from everything we thought we would be when we were 17? Or everything we thought we would be when we were 7?

I think a lot of us lose faith, creativity, and the ability to dream at all.

With jobs and responsibility and cars and freedom, these things are no longer muscles we exercise. They get smaller and smaller until one day, we try to use them - only to realize we do not know how anymore.

We get into our careers, our routines, our relationships, our homes, our every day responsibilities - the hamster wheel so many of us live on - and we forget what is important.

We create a life that becomes a prison, not because it lacks beauty but because we feel like it is the only way things can be.

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Recently in counseling, we were talking about things I wanted to do or changes I wanted to make. And no matter what the circumstance was, I found myself saying, “I think it sounds so exciting, but we can’t,” or, “Living there would be so fun, but we can’t.”

She stopped me, and she asked me what was happening in my mind when I got to “I can’t.” What was that thought pattern I was running into?

I think for me, and for a lot of us, it is that we get stuck thinking that how things are is how they will always be. We no longer have the faith in ourselves, the creativity to make it work, or the dreams to pursue in the first place.

We forget what we knew so confidently when we were kids: We can be whatever we want to be.

Maybe you always wanted to be a ballerina. You can sign up for a class and dance every Thursday night.

Maybe you always wanted to be a painter. You can buy a paintbrush and a canvas and start creating.

Maybe you always wanted to be a football player. You can get a group together to play every Saturday at the park.

You can still be whatever you want to be. It might look different than you expected, but that is okay. You are still a ballerina, a writer, or a football player.

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So I have challenge for you this week:

Think about who you thought you would be when you were 17, or 7. Is there something missing that maybe you lost along the way? Can you find a way to add it into your life - even if it is just a little bit?

Thank you so much for reading!

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And please respond to this email or let me know in the comments how the challenge goes for you this week!

Take care,

Caroline

P.S. If this newsletter piqued your interest, you would probably really enjoy the movie The Kid!