There are only two times so far in my life when I feel like I have heard God’s voice very clearly, almost as if audibly. Most often, God presses things on my heart in other ways - the conversations with people in my life, the verses in my devotional, the lyrics of a song. Typically, it is a combination of many of those things, a repetition of a theme across my life.
In the last month or so, I have seen this tactic - a constant theme repeated.
Simplicity.
Not just simplicity in the sense of owning less things, although that is a small part of it. It is a simplicity of gradual pruning and assessing of my life to make room for what is important and remove what is not.
Here are a few of the ways God has repeated this theme across my life in the past days and weeks…
Conversation in Counseling: Recently in counseling, we were talking about the possibility of Jackson and I moving somewhere new, and no matter where it was, I found myself saying, “Living there would be so fun, but we can’t.” She stopped me, and she asked me what was happening in my mind when I got to “I can’t.” After thinking, I decided it was a lot of things - what other people may think, our jobs, the lack of familiarity, money. But I also realized that at least a part of it was our stuff. I feel weighed down by all our physical belongings and our physical home.
Less Desire to Shop: I used to be a big shopper. In college, I always wanted to spend my Saturday mornings browsing and typically buying things I did not necessarily need. I am not sure exactly when, but something changed. Now when I go shopping, I get this anxious, almost nauseous feeling in my stomach. It took me a little bit to make the connection between shopping and these feelings, but once I did, I decided I was done shopping aimlessly.
Inspiration from Friends: A few of our friends just finished flipping a house, and while they flipped it, they slept on an air mattress in the middle of their construction zone. They put all their stuff in storage, lived without a kitchen for months, and woke up not knowing where they would live when they finished. And guess what? They were okay. Seeing their experience gave me similar feelings to those I had when talking about moving during counseling - a simultaneous excitement and unsettledness.
Decluttering Our Space: Over the past two weeks, Jackson and I went through our apartment and got rid of things. I have done this many times before, but usually, I do not end up getting rid of very much. Thoughts run through my head like, we might use this one day or what if I get rid of it and then end up needing it? This time however; we got rid of 4 trash bags full of clothes and a few more tubs filled with home things, shoes, and other miscellaneous items. It felt different this time. The typical thoughts of scarcity and fear were not quite as loud in my head. I was able to be decisive about items. I was able to say no to more.
Reassessing My Routines: If you know me, you know I love my routines. I find a lot of my safety and security in knowing what my morning will look like every day, how I will end my night, and what I will eat in between. However, recently, I have found myself wondering if maybe I have put so much structure in my life that I have boxed myself in. I can’t be present today because I am too worried about creating a safe and secure place for the next day or the next season.
…just to name a few.
Dying to Self
When I stop and think about the “I can’t” that would come to mind when discussing moving, the desire to shop and to buy more, the simultaneous awe and confusion of those living without a plan, and the thoughts I would have as I decluttered my clothes, I realize how many of the decisions I make come from my desire to have safety and security.
Basically all of them.
I lean towards things are familiar, routines, things that feel safe. I love home and plans and schedules. And there is nothing wrong with those things. I believe it is how God made me. However, he also made me to be reliant on Him. To trust Him. To have faith in Him. Not to rely on my routines. Not to trust in my home. Not to have faith in my stuff.
When I think about what in my life needs to be pruned to live more simply, a big one that comes to mind is the god of comfort, security, and safety.
This leads me to yet another repetition, or rather the more accurate word is conviction, about this theme in my life.
Sunday at church, the pastor was preaching in the first chapter of the gospel of John, when Jesus begins to call his first disciples to follow him. He talked about how the disciples asked Jesus, “Where are you staying?”, which in their time was essentially asking for permission to follow a Rabbi, or teacher, as well as asking about the Rabbi’s ability to provide for their basic needs.
Jesus’s response? “Come and see.”
The pastor parked there for a moment to talk about how in that moment, Jesus made no guarantees of the disciple’s provision or protection. In fact, throughout the gospels, it was more like the opposite. He guarantees trouble.
He went on to say that, in the same way, Jesus has made zero guarantees to our earthly safety, comfort, or security. The baseline for following Jesus is death to self.
I needed to hear that.
It made me think about a line from the movie “Where the Crawdads Sing”, which we watched last month for book club. The husband is talking about how they need to be careful messing in other people’s business (helping a young girl whose parents have abandoned her), and the wife responds by reminding her husband the Bible says nothing about being careful.
Simplicity of Purpose
Simplicity is not just about the space you live in and the things you own. It is the space in your mind. It is your priorities. It is living with a single purpose through which you filter everything else.
Simplicity is a mindset before it is a modification of behavior, and I believe living in simplicity offers more freedom and more peace.
There are a million things every day that are vying for our attention - the “urgent” email from your boss, the ad convincing you to buy just one more thing you do not need, the social media post from someone you do not know sending you into a comparison spiral. It is a lot easier to focus on things that are loud. Things that are right in your face, demanding your attention.
But I have found life to be much more rich when I allow my focus to linger on the things that truly matter to me.
Yes, simplicity is getting rid of things. I feel much lighter when I do. But before it can be that, it has to a change in your heart. A realization that all we have is fleeting. Only few things are eternal - God, His Word, and the souls of people.
Find what matters. Simplify your life around that.
Thank you so much for reading! I hope this left you feeling inspired and challenged. Feel free to reply to this email or comment to share your thoughts on simplicity!
Talk to you next week,
Caroline
Then he said to them, “Watch out and guard yourself from all types of greed because one’s life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions.”
- Luke 12:15