To-Do Lists & Your Younger Self
Reflections on how to be present and live life to the fullest.
Recently, I have noticed something about myself: I have been living my to-do list, not my life.
I wake up and look at what is on the agenda for the day. Usually, I book my days pretty accurately to where I finish what I need to and do not have time for much more. The to-do list never ends; therefore, my time to enjoy, rest, or do nothing never seems to come.
This quality of mine comes at the expense of a lot of things. I struggle to be spontaneous because I plan things so specifically each week. I get easily annoyed when something takes a little longer or does not go according to plan (which is a lot!). I stifle my husband’s adventurous spirit with my own fear.
Overall, I put a lot of pressure on myself.
And I just sit back and wonder, where did all this pressure come from? Pressure to do more, be more, accomplish more.
This draw to more is ever present in our lives. It is in our TVs, our phones, our relationships, our workplaces, other’s expectations for us, and especially our own expectations for ourselves.
And I don’t know that doing more or being more is the enemy. But rather, it is what we do or become more of.
Ultimately, this is what I do want to do more of in my life: spend time with those I love, be outside, read, go on walks, sing, watch the sunrise and sunset, cook healthy meals, laugh, swim in clear water, dance, play games, write, ride my bike, explore, and so much more.
But that is not what my to-do list looks like. It reads: fold the laundry, clean the bathroom, wash the car, get a new passport, go to the grocery store, and more.
I know those things are important. They are a part of being an adult. With freedom comes all that responsibility. I am not saying we all need to neglect our responsibilities, let our houses become a mess, throw a healthy lifestyle out the window, and just do whatever we please.
Certain things have to get done, and of course, some things have time restraints on them. But why do I treat those things are more important than doing the things I want to do? Why do I make sure all the countertops are wiped off on Sundays, but I neglect being in the sunshine or listen to a song I love? Why do I prioritize taking care of my clothes over taking care of my own physical, mental, spiritual, and emotional well-being?
For me, it is because having fun or partaking in my favorite hobby is never on my to-do list, but chores and tasks always are.
And my to-do list has been dictating my life.
So one could argue, Caroline, why don’t you just put things you enjoy doing on your to-do list?
Well, I am glad you asked. I tried that.
I tried putting walks and hobbies and creative outlets on my to-do list. But you know how when you have to do something it takes all the fun out of it? That is what putting those things on my to-do list did for me.
Maybe that works for some people, but it did not work for me.
The alternative is this: stop living life by your to-do list!
How can I do this?
I think there are a few broad ideas that will help me (and hopefully you) live a little more and not have every day revolve around to-do’s.
I am not throwing all my routines and habits out the window. I have worked hard to develop those things, and I am proud of them! They help me stay organized, grounded, and safe. However…
I am breaking some of my own rules. I am pushing a little to see where it feels okay to give and where it does not. I am leaning into a little more freedom - encouraging myself to not just do the things I have to do but also some things I want to do. Allowing myself to go outside my routine.
I am connecting more to the things that younger me loved to do - singing and dancing to a new favorite song, doodling words that bring me peace, reading fiction books before bed, playing outside, and so much more.
I am choosing to live my life, not just my to-do list.
For he does not think much about the fleeting days of his life because God keeps him preoccupied with the joy he derives from his activity.
Ecclesiastes 5:20
Thanks for reading! I hope this was helpful for you and encourages you to set aside your to-do list for a few hours, go outside of your comfort zone, and do things your younger self would love!
Talk to you next week.
Take care,
Caroline
Excellent insight! A to-do is good, within reason. But you don’t need a to-do list everyday! It’s okay to have nothing to do and to sit in that. I enjoy some time when I have nothing to do!